Forever young.

"Speak now or forever hold your peace in pieces."

I want to be Titanium.

Suddenly this song, which I hated so much, made a lot of sense to me.

I ‘m bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won’t fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won’t fall
I am titanium
(Titanium – David Guetta ft. Sia)

This ever-popular (and somewhat annoying) song has been on airplay for weeks now. Before this song existed, I never knew titanium existed. I saw a tweet about it yesterday, which intrigued me and urged me to find out what it really was. After reading everything I could find about titanium (mostly on Wikipedia though), it finally makes sense to me when Sia shouts “I am Titaaaaaniuuuuum!!” in that song, and it sunk upon me that yes, maybe I do want to become titanium too after all.

What is Titanium? Titanium is a chemical element (symbol “Ti”) with atomic number 22. It’s relatively known for its high strength-to-weight ratio, in which it has low density but is extremely strong. Titanium is a lustrous, silver metal and is widely used for it’s resistance to corrosion. It also has a very high melting point at more than 1,650 °C.

Now that we have established the basic properties of titanium, let me show you the several reasons why I wish I was made out of (or similar in properties) with titanium.

Titanium has high strength-to-weight ratio. While titanium is 45% lighter than most steels, it is also more than twice as strong as them. Does anyone know the feeling of having the world on their shoulders? How heavy your shoulders feel, and your back aches continually because of the thought of the problems you’re facing? While heaviness has been used to describe pain, burden and hardship, lightness has been used to describe otherwise. In the dictionary, lightness has been described as:

  • the quality of being agile, nimble and graceful
  • lack of pressure and burdensomness
  • gaiety of manner, speech, style etc.; cheerfulness

Just imagine being able to be happy at all times, yet at the same time maintaining your strength. Not physical strength, no. But being strong in a sense where you can shield yourself from any negativity. Mentally and emotionally strong, yes. Not being someone who is weak and feeble, someone who does not break under pressure, someone who stays morally firm, confident and incorruptible despite all the pollution in the world. If that was the case, I would love to have a high strength-to-weight ratio too; to be extremely light yet at the same time, extremely strong.

Titanium is a lustrous, silver metal. Though in this case, “lustrous” means to shine and be luminous (as in shiny metal), it could als0 mean “brilliant”, “splendid” and “resplendent”. To have a lustrous career means to have a wonderful career, so what is wrong with wanting to be a lustrous person? Someone who is bright, dazzling, elegant and full of splendour. Someone that people can admire and look up to and go to for reference or advice. Being silver in colour also plays a significant part in me wishing I was titanium. In traditional tarot card reading, the colour silver represents moon energy (Moon Tarot Card). The meaning of silver is also associated with mystery, femininity and female power and is often seen as a glamorous, sophisticated color related to female energy, prosperity and modernity. Silver is also associated with the element of water and flow of the tides. It is fluid, emotional, sensitive and mysterious and is also soothing, calming and purifying.

Water symbolizes life and self-exploration. Water nurtures, cleanses, heals and soothes. Water can also refer to reflection and self-exploration. Water serves as a mirror. To see beyond its surface, one must use their intuitive nature to grasp what lies beneath its facade. The same can be said for the process of self-exploration. It requires willingness to look beneath our own surfaces and discover who we truly are. Water often refers to feminine aspects. Because of water’s association to the life force, it symbolically functions as the “great womb” of mother earth. Thus, water can refer to fertility, birth and creation. Water serves as reminder that our souls have depths beyond our conscious perceptions. Symbolically water can represent the realm of our emotions which are constantly flowing and changing. It represents an emotional surrender and urges one to stop fighting the natural flow of the Universe. If we struggle against its currents, we will find ourselves stuck, unable to open ourselves to divine intervention and purpose. Water gives support, life and energy. It purifies the body and soothes the heart. In tarot, water symbolism always teaches us about our inner beings. Its flow always follows the path of the soul.

Other than that, from a colour psychology viewpoint, silver also signals a time for reflection and a change of direction as it illuminates the way forward. It releases all mental, physical and emotional issues and destroys obstacles in front of you as it opens new doors to the future. It reflects back any energy given out, positive or negative. It protects itself from any negativity and reflects the energy back to where it began. Silver is respectable, courteous, dignified, self-controlled, responsible, determined and organized. It is also seen as a good critic, unbiased and compassionate with a mature sense of justice. As stated above, silver also represents the Moon Tarot Card, which in its positive aspects is “a card of genius, of mental breakthroughs, astonishing creativity, powerful magic, and intuition”.

Just how great would it be, to be an elegant, wise and respected lady, who sees the path she wants to take clearly in life? I would want to be that kind of person. Whenever it feels like something is wrong, I don’t want to merely break down and shatter. I want to be able to retain my composure, and use that as a time to reflect on what I have done, who I have been and how I can turn the tables around to my favour. In hard times, I do not want to come out scarred and bruised. Instead, I want to come out a whole new person, someone with clearer perspectives. I want to be that person who knows herself inside and out, the kind to know herself better than anyone else knows her. Our soul is more than what we actually know. Most people don’t realize it because they do not go deep within themselves to figure out who they truly are. To be able close one eye to those who dislike you, and to open your heart to anyone who is sincere, genuine and kind; that must be nice. I wouldn’t want to be biased. I want to be fair. I want to be lustrous and silver.

Titanium is highly resistant to corrosion.
Yes, be it sea water or chlorine, titanium does not corrode easily. Let’s pretend that corrosion refers to all the negativity that this world possesses; if I was a metal slate, I must be a goddamn rusty metal slate by now. I want to be able to be resistant to negative vibes. How I wish it didn’t get to me as easily as it does. Although I try my best to brush any form of cynical remark or hurtful criticism off my shoulders, a part of me knows it punctures a small hole in the depths of my tiny heart. I just hide it well though, I rarely let my despondency show through. It’ll be wonderful to actually be resistant to those kind of things. Not completely resistant, no, because that would just make me arrogant, but just enough to acknowledge them and make room for self-improvement, yet not taking these criticisms to heart; taking it as advice rather as insult. Besides, it is only an insult if you believe it is.

Titanium has very high melting point. Patience. Everything about that revolves around patience. As quoted from Moliere, “A wise man is superior to any insults which can be put upon him, and the best reply to unseemly behavior is patience and moderation.” This is actually a great quote to live by. I would love to be a patient person. There has been countless of times where I blew up and threw vulgarities everywhere. Wouldn’t the world be a much more peaceful place if everyone learned to keep their composure? The people that we often admire and look up to are always those who are extremely patient, and more than always, these people are the ones who have been through the most in life, yet they have remained calm and composed through everything. Why do we always complain of misery and suffering when in retrospect we haven’t truly lived at all? Is the measure of human patience that low? How I wish I had an extremely high melting point too.

The processes required to extract titanium are laborious and costly. Well, most definitely. Would something so marvelous be easy to acquire? I doubt so. This is something I really think teenagers (girls, especially) should apply to themselves. To be precious, significant, to be “titanium”, one must first learn to not be cheap. Though that might be rude, it is unfortunately true. Girls these days tend to give themselves up too easily to boys (using the word “boys” and not “men”, because men are not blood-sucking jerks) and when these guys screw them over, these girls mourn to no end. In the midst of her pain, she pinpoints another boy to make her feel better momentarily, only to have the cycle repeat all over again. Why? If you’re going to change lovers almost every month, that’s already some sort of cheap to me. You expect to find a man who can love you for who you are, but you aren’t even patient enough to wait for the right guy to come along and you have already given all of you to the wrong boy. Remember that the person who likes you does not necessarily love you. Even if you do insist on being with him, do not show and give him all of you, metaphorically and literally. Have some dignity and don’t be so easily attained. Give that heart a break. As for me, the man who is going to have all of me better be working hard and have some dough on him to acquire this piece of titanium.

Here are some other great things about titanium:

  • Titanium Nitride is used to coat cutting tools. This coating makes sure that the cutting material does not wear very easily. It’s like someone running forcefully into danger, taking risks, yet trusting their own instincts, feeling “protected” by themselves. Someone who gives out an aura of confidence and strength.
  • When alloyed with other metals (iron, aluminium etc.), it can produce other strong lightweight metals. It’s like 2 become 1. With the right person, your relationship will persist. Light, it is, because love is always present, but also strong, not shattering despite any arguments or misunderstanding.
  • Titanium dioxide is very opaque in a pure and brilliant white colour. White has always been known to represent purity, virginity, kindness, wholeness and completion. It is also the manifestation of all colours, the complete energy of light. Wouldn’t it be delightful to have such heavenly traits?
  • Titanium dioxide is usually used in paint and it does well in severe temperatures, and it is also used in sunscreen due to its ability to protect the skin. Being able to stay calm during extreme situations will come in very handy. People don’t think well under stress. To be someone’s “sunscreen protecting their skin” would simply mean being able to calm other people down as well, advising them and trying to protect them from any negativity.
  • Titanium is used for surgical implants such as joint replacements. When someone is broken, or is feeling empty, you’d be the one there to fill their void, to cheer them up and to make them feel better.
  • Titanium cannot be melted in open air. It is only possible in an inert atmosphere or in a vacuum. Being upset and disappointed is a human nature, but showing it to the public is completely by choice. I’d rather be someone who cries and finds solace in my own place, rather than show it off to the whole world. Let me weep silently, and when I’m done, I will feel better.

As great as titanium is however, if proper tools are not used in machining, the material will eventually soften and gall. In this sentence, “gall” means to lose metal to the other because of heat. However, “gall” could also be a state of irritation. Human beings if pushed to the limit by annoyance, will eventually fall into a state of irritation. And if not cared for and handled properly, we, being creatures fully capable of emotions, will break down no matter how strong we are. Every person has a breaking point, it just depends on how far it can go. As for me, I want my breaking point to be titanium.

To be titanium means to be strong, to be patient, to be elegant, to be sophisticated, to be calm, to be elegant, to know yourself, to help others, to be clear and to stay happy. To have that kind of personality would seem almost too perfect and too good to be true.

I want to be Titanium.


3 comments on “I want to be Titanium.

  1. Jess
    December 27, 2013

    Thankyou very very much for writing this.

  2. Justine Bhebx
    June 3, 2014

    Jev will really rely on this probably.

  3. Justine Bhebx
    June 3, 2014

    Thumbs up! 🙂

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This entry was posted on July 31, 2012 by in Music and tagged , , , , , , , , , .
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